The expectation for a man is that He is the strong one. Not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually. When tragedy hits the home, he is the life raft his family will cling to for security and strength. He may weep privately over many things, but a man is a rock for his family. His goal in life is not to be emotionally carried by his wife and children, his goal is to carry them. Be strong for them. Be an anchor for them. And to help them navigate the trouble waters of life with his love and provision at the lead.
There is a masculinity crisis in the modern world. And what I mean by that is not neanderthalian, fart contest winning, beer bonging, grab happy, chest bumping caricatures of manhood that we have all been conditioned to accept as normative. Anyone can grow up to become a big-bodied mass with a penis… What I am talking about is men. Real men. Biblical men. And we need them now more than ever.
We need that same kind of iron clad warrior who bravely sounded the alarm nearly 200 years ago, against the coming plague of feminism, but the world was far too foolish to listen to them. Now, instead, we are the recipients of an emasculated world, where men appear in dresses on magazine covers, and the perverted laud them for their courage. We need real men. And let me clear, sinful masculinity is equally toxic as well. This post is about Biblical, godly, creation-ordered, manhood… Now, after a heart amen, I assume you are ready to continue? Well enough…
After decades of manlessness, the majority of men find themselves in the peculiar position of having no real clue what Biblical masculinity looks like. And frankly it is not their fault. Most men did not have fathers, grandfathers, pastors, mentors, or godly masculine men in their life, as they were growing up, so they have little to no vision of what that even looks like. And because of that, the next generation of boys will be just as blind as we all were when it is their turn to be at the helm.
For this reason, we need a revival of true masculinity. We need a return to God, a return to His Word, and a return to the God-blessed realm of what true manhood can offer the world, which God Himself called very good and blessed. And when we do that, we can change the world.
I would say many, if not most, of the problems plaguing this culture and especially the church have to do with failed masculinity, and weak, impotent, emasculated men. If that is true, then producing a new culture of Biblical, Christ-like, servant men will be an undeniable blessing, not only to the church, but to the entire world. Just as all ships in a harbor are lifted by the rising tide, all people will be benefited by the rise of a Biblically faithful culture of men.
No more excuses. It is time for us to open up our Bibles and get to work. Let’s go!
Over the next several weeks, we will be looking at 6 fundamental characteristics of what it means to be a godly man. We will speak frankly, unapologetically, but most importantly Biblically on this topic… And we will call men to imitate the true man, Jesus Christ, as we seek to ACT LIKE MEN, WORSHIP LIKE MEN, LOVE LIKE MEN, FIGHT LIKE MEN, LEAD LIKE MEN, AND BUILD LIKE MEN.
#1: What does it mean to act like men?
We begin today by looking at what it means to Act Like Men!
And there is no better place to begin, than by considering what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13:11. He says:
When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things.
This verse really does present the entire case for Biblical manhood in two basic words; “grow” and “up!” That’s right, I said it, we need to “grow up!” We need to stop acting like a battalion of lilly flowers, we need to stop thinking in childish ways, and eliminate the immaturity in our speech, and step into the real world of maturity that God designed us to live in!
But I do not want to speak in generalities here… So, let’s go a step further, just so it is crystal clear what this means.
In the home, the infant is the purest distillation of ego-centricism on earth. Dads, you may feel like you exist to entertain them. Moms, you definitely have felt like you exist to serve them. It can feel like they believe they are at the center of the universe demanding their every need.
They act as though their needs are the only needs worth caring about and that they are the only ones who matter. They do not seem to mind at all about screaming during your phone call, interrupting your precious sleep, and they seem totally oblivious to that essential task you were doing. Stop it and feed me, they seem to scream. Stop what you are doing and change me. Stop the things that are important to you and figure out why I am crying… I will stop when you get it right… Essentially the baby lives like his needs matter more than yours, dear mother, and if you do not believe me, it is because you have not yet had one.
I think God makes them so cute, so that we can’t help but love them. This is especially true for mom’s, who laugh, smile, ooh and ah, even while border on the verge of literal exhaustion and being treated by this baby like no reasonable adult in our life ever would! If you really think about it, and get past all of their cuddly cuteness, they are the most needy, whiny, self-absorbed, time-sucking people in your life! And you love them like no one else. What a beautiful love God has placed into your hear, dear daughter of Eve.
And that is certainly an endearing quality in a helpless babe who needs his mother incessantly for their entire existence, but I am sure you would agree that it is a noseauting quality in your man. No woman on earth wants to be a parent to a child and to a husband… But yet so many women end up feeling like they have adult babies for their spouses. I have heard that message consistently for years. It is a massive burden on a woman who wants to be led by you, to feel like she is the one leading you. And I am not excusing her sin, but your sin is not helping very much either, brother.
There are far too many men who live this way, and apparently did not jump through the necessary hurdles of maturation, only to graduate into manhood with a male body, but a fetal mind. This kind of man acts like their needs are the only ones that matter. They prioritize themselves, their emotions, their wants, their priorities, over everyone else. And they act just as spoiled as the soiled screaming toddler at their feet. The only advantage they seem to have in their manhood, is that they get to have sex with their wives, who struggles more than you realize, with how childish you and I can be.