Pause and take a step back from your plans to fire your pastors and instead, consider how you might help them to become the faithful shepherds God has called them to be…. Before you take steps to fire your current pastor and then hire in a new one and treat him the same way … perhaps you should consider the following four responsibilities all church members bear toward their pastors.

Week after week the most frequently searched topic that lands people at this website is “How to Fire Your Pastor.” If you are a regular reader of this site you may recall that I wrote a three part series under that title several months ago. My reaction to this traffic coming to our site because of that search terminology is one of both sadness and revelation. Sadness because we desperately need faithful pastors in our churches, and revelation because apparently some people believe the best (wisest, most God-glorifying) step to take would be to fire their pastors, so they are looking for that advice.

Today, I would like to encourage you to pause and take a step back from your plans to fire your pastors and instead, consider how you might help them to become the faithful shepherds God has called them to be.

The truth is, barring some sort of overt, heinous sin (which sometimes, yes, appropriately leads to the immediate firing of a pastor), most pastors are “let go” (really, fired) for reasons that could have, and should have, been addressed by many more people than just the pastor. For example, you may be ready to fire your pastor because he is disorganized and often drops administrative details. Did you hire him for his exegetical, scholarly, preaching/teaching skills and then make plans to surround him with people who are strong administratively? Has he asked for an assistant and have you denied him that year after year? What about personality clashes? Have you observed a growing conflict between your pastor and another influential person in your church—and done nothing about it? Have you been a faithful peacemaker to assist these Christians in conflict? Or have you stood back, shook your head and said, “Too bad!”; while you waited for the explosion that recently happened?

How well have you loved your pastor? Really loved him with a faithful, abiding, prayerful love?

Before you take steps to fire your current pastor and then hire in a new one and treat him the same way … perhaps you should consider the following four responsibilities all church members bear toward their pastors:

1. Members owe their pastors love (despite their pastors’ weaknesses). Too many churches place unreasonable expectations on their pastors. Those expectations become the standard of performance rather than the Scriptures. Nowhere in the Bible do we find perfection manifested in humanity except in our Lord Jesus. Unfortunately, many people expect their pastor to be as perfect as their Savior. Rather than realizing a pastor’s role is to point people to their only true hope in Christ, too many people look to their pastor for that model of perfection. While pastors are to be models of holiness and live lives reflecting the character of Christ (as we all are!), it is unrealistic to expect any human to fulfill what only Christ can do. Church members have a responsibility to love their pastor by seeing him as a fellow follower of the Lord dealing with the same struggles and life challenges they do as a fallen creature redeemed solely by grace through faith in Christ.
2. Members owe their pastors honesty. When disappointment surfaces over any aspect of the pastoral role, be it personality, preaching or teaching performance, leadership or character, members are called to be faithful friends by going personally, quietly, quickly and gently to their pastor with their specific concern. Before going, members are to remember to “get the log out of their own eye first” (Matthew 7:5), remembering that their goal is to be a friend and fellow pilgrim with their brother of faith (Hebrews 11:13-16) and not a critic bringing a message of discouragement. Members have a responsibility to help their pastor change just as they need to change by allowing God’s Word to be “more loud and vivid than previous life experience” (to quote Dr. David Powlison). They do that by not having an attitude of the judge or critic, but by coming alongside as a fellow servant with gentle and honest concern. Church members have the responsibility to come to their pastors with any concern only when they come ready to pray for and be part of the solution as a faithful partner in ministry.
3. Members owe their pastors respect. Every church member owes every other member respect because they are image bears of The Father, their creator. We each, as believers in Christ, know we are different because we have been given a new heart, a renewed heart enabled by faith to both see the created things of this world as evidence of God’s love, and to read, believe, and trust his Word in the Scriptures as eternal truth displayed so that we might know more fully His faithfulness in Christ. As new creatures we are, therefore, “compelled by the love of Christ” (2 Corinthians 5:14) to see our pastors with eyes of compassion for whom Christ died and to respect the unique demands placed on them; those who have been called to bring His Word to our ears and hearts remembering that God’s Word is, at times, difficult for us to hear because it convicts of us our own sin…our guilt and shame. But pastors also bring us hope in Christ that our sins are forgiven and our guilt and shame no longer the bondage capable of holding us in personal condemnation. The role of being a messenger of conviction and freedom is incredibly demanding and we owe our pastors a special measure of respectfulness as they balance this difficult task.
4. (And I, Tara, would add that …) Members owe their pastors prayer and encouragement. Both of my children, since they were three years old, could go right down the list and name our shepherd-overseers because they have prayed for them over and over again. (“And God bless Pastor Alfred, Pastor Jason, Elder Schaner, Elder Feralio, Elder Petsch …”) And they have regularly sent hand-made cards, pictures, and notes to them (as have Fred and I–well, cards and thank you notes, but not hand-made). Why? Because shepherd-overseers have a very serious and important job to do. It is not a light thing to take on the responsibility for the souls of sheep. These are busy men with jobs and families and many duties in addition to their shepherding responsibilities—surely the very least we can do for them is to be regularly praying for them and thanking them for their care! Plus, God forbid, if any of our hearts ever become hardened by the deceitfulness of sin, and one of our pastors has to “leave the 99” to come after our wandering heart with the (loving, painful) ministration of the rod and staff … well … their redemptive ministry has a much higher likelihood of “success” if we have a relationship established with them. As Ken Sande says, “Rules without relationship leads to rebellion.” So we are all called to build relationship now so that we can have the accountability and discipline of rules as needed.

The next time you find yourself considering whether to side with the group who is calling for the pastor to be fired, please remember that you have a responsibility to him that is consistent with the responsibility he has to you: love, honesty, respect, and prayerful encouragement. That is what God calls us all to do as his eternal children:

In everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets (Matthew 7:12).

Many churches recognize an annual “Pastor Appreciation Month” in October. How might you take tangible steps to show your pastor love, honesty, respect, and prayerful encouragement this month—and every month?

Dave Edling is a Ruling Elder in the Presbyterian Church in America and writes in Redeeming Church Conflicts. This article was written with Tara Barthel and is used with permission.