A life well-aligned is one that keeps in perspective the greater story for which we have been created. This requires humility and perception because it means that we must accept that we cannot—and should not—do everything. This also means that we are now free to pursue true excellence in the things we are called to achieve, and it requires us to be creative with our resources.
Wonder Woman by Kate Harris is my favorite book in the Barna Group’s Framesseries. In the book, Harris cites a statistic that resonates with me and many other women:
72 percent of women say they are overwhelmed by stress.
I’m suspicious of the remaining 28 percent.
Women living in a world noisy with conflicting directives to excel in their career, be a doting wife and super mom, invest in their communities, and develop their personal potential will inevitably experience some confusion about their calling and identity.
Recently, I wrote an open letter to millennial women explaining how, given the effects of scarcity, it’s not possible to do it all. We’re often told that we need to achieve balance, but in such a complex world with such diverse responsibilities, I tend to chuckle at the term.
In Wonder Woman, Harris posits that instead of searching for balance we should aspire to find coherence in our vocations and stewardship. I agree with her for several reasons.
1. Balance implies a constantly maintained equilibrium.
We can’t find balance in a broken, complex world. Our roles are constantly changing, and we are constantly anticipating or adapting to change.
In a 2010 TED talk, Sheryl Sandberg points out that women are likely to start planning for major life changes well before they occur. This might be a marriage or a child or a career change. This is not a bad thing. We should be fully engaged in our world.
However, it’s unrealistic to expect that the ratio we settle on in one instance will remain true in all situations. A “balanced” life may look terribly unbalanced in favor of an area of pressing need.
2. Coherence embraces limitations dictated by a scarce world.
We’re constrained by resources, time, energy, and others’ schedules. If we seek coherency, we seek to live in light of the needs that we can and should meet.